She only comes to me when she is lonely. I thought if I can go through a withdrawl that I could face pretty much everything painful from giving birth to breaking my ribs.. I really miss her. The only thing thatd help on my sleepless nights was holding onto my giant pillow and wishing it was her. I had one thing helping me clean up that noone else did, I had my riri. But now shes gone away. When I was withdrawling I could feel aches in every joint, and at my brain where my Mu-receptors are. Im glad I woke up clean yesterday. No sweating or rld, it felt like I did heroin and went to sleep but this is just how im supposed to feel, im glad I dont have to suck on a pen anymore just to get up and start my day. Im so happy I withdrawled!!! Took about 7 nasty days, but only 4 of those days were spent in murderous pain. Now I have this huge ache where my heart is and I feel a heavy feeling in my throat. All I can tell myself is if I went through the withdrawal I can take the heart break.. But that isnt helping I just miss my baby more and more I know shes out there and desnt need me anymore. It fucking hurts because I am still very much inlove with her. I wonder how long this withdrawal will last… I only did black for two heavy months, I ve been with my gf 3yrs and of all the small break ups I can tell this time it’s really over.
